How to Deal With Jealousy In Your Marriage
How to stop being jealous of your husband?
Jealousy is that green-eyed monster that can destroy even the strongest family, in which harmony and mutual love reign. This feeling is blind and merciless, and one must learn to keep it under the most severe control. Judge for yourself: every woman, even the most attractive and gentle, but jealous of her spouse for every skirt that passes by, very quickly transforms into a hysterical, squabbler and simply intolerable personality.
True jealous women will not disdain to search the pockets of their beloved, examine the possessed by his tablet or phone, examine the collar of his shirt for lipstick with a microscope, and even become a private detective. As a result, a man either really turns on a passion on the side, or completely leaves the family.
A feeling that has good reason and is supported by irrefutable facts is inherent in any, even the most patient, tactful and self-possessed wife.
And it appears after the husband periodically or constantly:
- Flirts with common female acquaintances;
- Gives foreign ladies double compliments;
- Doesn't sleep at home, comes home late from work, inventing strange and untrue pretexts for delays;
- If he completely ignores his spouse about sex;
- Hiding with a mobile phone in another room.
So, what to do in such situations, when endurance and patience are running out? You should definitely not demonstrate your disinterest in what is happening, but you also don't need to get hysterical. It is important to calmly discuss with your spouse all the points that bother you, give logical arguments and ask him to explain. So it will be possible to preserve your own dignity, not to provoke family scenes of jealousy, because of which it will be very ashamed.
Jealousy without reason
This is an emotion that is in no way controlled by a woman, and does not obey external conditions, can lead to unpredictable and bad consequences. Unjustified jealousy of your spouse for his past, a conductor, a waitress or even a mother usually has purely psychological reasons.
Typically, this behavior is inherent in women with huge inner complexes, low self-esteem and self-doubt. In fact, they cannot be convinced that they can be loved, they can be faithful and loyal.
Painful jealousy appears due to the fact that the spouse is afraid of losing her lover, and tries tokeep him near you in any conceivable and inconceivable way.
But, the paradox of the situation is that such a family life comes to an end quickly.
So how do you learn not to be jealous of your husband? See what psychologists advise on this:
- For starters, you just need to prove to yourself how charming, beautiful, loved and appreciated you are. There is no need to dwell on the errors of appearance or character that everyone has. Find all your positive qualities and do not stop thinking about them. Believe me, women with powerful charisma, confident in their own attractiveness and importance, never ask questions like: What if I am very jealous of my husband ?
- Remember, thoughts are very material, and the more often you imagine your faithful in the arms of his ex, the more likely he will be there. Think positively
- Wives marching around the house in worn-out slippers, with a fat ponytail or a hanging tummy look very ugly and unattractive. They tend to go the other way from such people, take note of this,
- It is possible that the answer to the question of how to stop being jealous of a husband is hidden in complete financial dependence on him. Any woman needs to realize herself in the professional field, have her own pocket money, tasks, goals and aspirations,
- If you are increasingly tormented by a thought like: Jealous of your husband to his past , you will have to learn to live in the present and appreciate what you have at the moment. Otherwise, your whole life will pass in doubts and fears, and you simply will not notice your personal happiness,
- It is quite possible that the question of how not to be jealous of your husband can be solved only by a psychotherapist. This is especially true in cases where a woman has already had to experience betrayal of partners, and she cannot get rid of the feeling of trick and danger,
- The source of jealousy needs to be identified. To do this, it is enough to be alone with yourself for some time and put in order thoughts, facts, feelings and emotions,
- You need to stop identifying yourself with the movie stars, pop singers and fashion models your man likes. Strive to become an ideal for him, and do not rely on someone else's fame and success,
- Stop spying and talk to your partner calmly instead. Tell him that you have long been jealous of his mother-in-law, business partner, bakery saleswoman, or even his own sister. Achieve a mutual decision and trust in each other, even if you have to spend several hours in a row,
- Thought: Jealous of her husband to her mother-in-law , usually born to women whose husbands put their mother above all else. It is difficult to recommend something here, since this behavior is the result of education. And if the spousedoes not deprive you of attention and care, but spends a lot of time with his mother, you have to put up with this, because he sets an excellent example for children. Besides, no one is forever, remember this and take it as you want
- If the phrase is firmly stuck in my head: Jealous of her husband to his own sister , understand the absurdity of your behavior and style of thinking. An indulgence can be done only if the sister is a cousin or your own, but even in such situations you should not panic and hysteria ahead of time. Reformulate all claims to your loved one regarding the lack of attention to your person in proposals to spend time together: visit the cinema or go to nature.
It is much more difficult for those who cannot get rid of the thought: Jealous of the husband to his ex-wife . Failed spouses can be connected by many circumstances: children, business, relatives, the habit of communicating, in the end. Everything but the last one will have to be put up with for a very long time.
For the rest, it is enough to show more attention to the faithful, endure, seek common interests and form a new family hearth, which will be better than the previous one.
Towards the end, I want to say: try to make jealousy a feeling of control. And then you will find great family happiness, well-being and peace of mind. Are not incentives ?!