How To Save A Marriage When Only One Is Trying
How to save a marriage?
The relationship between a man and a woman never freezes in place. Falling in love replaces passion, followed by affection, respect and love in the broadest sense of the word. The feeling of love is described by poets and prose writers of different times and continents, it is multifaceted, has an infinite number of shades. Not surprisingly, search engines on the Internet give out hundreds of thousands of definitions of this concept.
Over time, couples in love begin to think about how to preserve love in marriage, because those brightest feelings that were at the beginning of a heartfelt friendship no longer excite the blood so intensely.
Gone are sleepless nights and butterflies in the stomach, they were replaced by regularity, warmth of gentle embrace, constancy. And this is not bad, but on the contrary, of course. But if the passion and stormy excitement of the time of love gave way to apathy, indifference and mutual resentment, it is worth thinking about how to keep a man's love.
A separate question is how to keep love at a distance. It often happens that life forces partners to stay for a long time away from each other. In such a situation, it is more difficult to maintain a close connection, help and lend a shoulder in difficult times. In this situation, it is important to think over all the little things of communication, not to miss the implicit nuances that can subsequently destroy the relationship.
Do you need to think about how to keep a man's love? Maybe the true feeling does not need analysis? It would seem that live and enjoy, and if the bonds are fragile, then sooner or later the couple will break up, despite the partners' efforts to preserve the marriage. It turns out that working on relationships is a must!
Many divorces of young families happen because of banal everyday troubles. The first passions pass, the grinding-in period comes, when both spouses must make certain compromises, give up not very important principles, thereby smoothing out sharp corners.
If you do not consciously approach the issue, leave everything to chance, then sooner or later a lump of grievances and problems will accumulate: he cannot take out garbage, refuses to go to the theater with her, did not congratulate his parents on their anniversary.
Or in another way: she did not want to cook dinner, refused to evaluate his new collection of helicopters, threw a tantrum when he wanted to meet friends in a men's company. All these little things are solvable, you just need to be attentive to your partner and hide your egoism away. How to keep love in a relationship? Think about your marriage, take care of your partner, think about your ownand don't ask too much of the guy. After all, wisdom has long been known: we see a speck in someone else's eye, we don't notice in our own log.
what is common?
In order for the relationship to last long and successfully, young people must have common life goals, similar ideas about the future, consistent basic aspirations. If a guy sees himself, say, in politics, is ready to build a career 24 hours a day, this is his choice. The girl next to him should be clearly aware that she cannot and should not change him. If she truly loves, then she accepts the values and goals of her partner.
There should be no controversy on this basis.
For example, it is naive to expect that after the wedding a young husband will forget about his workaholism and exchange work for daily gatherings with friends or leisurely evening walks with his wife.
You need to initially ask yourself a number of questions before deciding on a long-term serious relationship:
- What do I want to achieve in life? What are my goals? Will this man help me achieve them?
- What is the guy dreaming about? What are his main passions and unbreakable principles?
- Am I ready to accept my partner as he is? Do his habits suit me?
If you analyze the situation as calmly as possible, it becomes clear whether the couple will be able to maintain love, and how the relationship will develop in the future.
It is naive to believe that if a man fell in love with his future beautiful wife, then this is sure to be forever. Unfortunately, after marriage, many girls lose their vigilance and stop caring for themselves.
This concerns not only the appearance (remember the type from the jokes - a wife with curlers in her hair and a dressing gown), but also the development of a woman as a person.
Wise ladies know how to keep love in marriage. You need to constantly strive for more and better: develop new skills, improve those that you already have, from time to time look for yourself in unknown areas, finally, leave your comfort zone in order to reach new heights.
Believe me, a loving man will appreciate such efforts. He will understand that next to him there is a dynamic personality for whom it is important to improve himself. What guy wouldn't be proud of his partner if she doesn't stand still?
This gives the man confidence that he made the right choice, strengthens his relationship and spurs his partner to new achievements. Only those couples who grow up together are inseparable and strong.
tips for women
Since keeping love in a relationship is important for many women, they often think about ways to strengthen their union. And it is right! After all, the role of a family psychologist often falls on the fragile shoulders of a girl.
The ability to be soft, reasonable, calm always comes to the aid of feelings. MudrosWhat a woman is all about is to curb momentary emotions, resist the impulse and come up with the right solution to overcome their psychological dilemma, if there is one.
The easiest way to throw a tantrum is if the husband does not behave the way his wife would like. Unfortunately or fortunately, guys rarely react normally to women crying, stamping feet or, even worse, broken dishes.
Such intemperance repels a man, cools his feelings, makes him alert and defend himself. On the contrary, if the wife is able to pull herself together and gently guide the spouse to the decision she needs, he will appreciate it and thank you for your understanding. Next time, he wants to do something nice to his wife, not to quarrel.
In a relationship, little things are extremely important: do not forget to say thank you, make pleasant surprises and compliments, from time to time take on the responsibilities of a partner. These little things make up the life of a couple. If you do not put logs on the fire of passion, you can find yourself in a very unpleasant situation, up to a break in the relationship.
How to keep love at a distance without paying attention to the daily little things? If the partners are far from each other, then constant little effort is simply necessary.
It's worth doing something nice to your loved one once again:
- write an SMS or send an e-card;
- remotely order flowers with courier delivery;
- compose a short poem in which to tell about your feelings;
- make a collage of joint photos and send to your loved one;
- talk about how your day went, ask for advice;
- listen carefully to what is in your partner's soul, support his actions and plans;
- paint a painting in watercolor or oil and send your masterpiece;
- visit his parents if he is far away and worries about their well-being;
- sign up for fitness classes and refuse to eat at night - the next time you meet, you will pleasantly delight the guy with your results: a slim fit figure and shed extra pounds.
Every girl can come up with many more ways to please a man, without making super-difficult efforts. The main thing is to understand the principle: you need to work on relationships, regardless of whether your loved one is nearby or temporarily lives in another city.
You cannot rely on chance, expecting that a man is obliged to love a woman, if at the beginning of the novel his feelings burned with a bright flame. Long-term happy marriages require attention from both spouses, respect for feelings.
It happens that couples lack life experience, self-confidence or an objective view of relationships from the outside. If the situation is out of control, it is worth remembering the opportunity to seek professional help from a family psychologist. It's very effective!